The Burial of Jesus: Joseph of Arimathaea

Flavius Josephus, before he was adopted by the Roman Emperor, was named Joseph bar Mathea, or the son of Mathea. A tiny perturbation of his birth name gives you Joseph bArmathea or Joseph of Arimathea, because there simply is no such place as Arimathea.

“…Yet did not Josephus {bar Mathea;} grow weary, even in this utmost extremity, to beg of them to spare what was left of the city; he spake largely to them about their barbarity and impiety, and gave them his advice in order to their escape; though he gained nothing thereby more than to be laughed at by them; and as they could not think of surrendering themselves up, because of the oath they had taken, nor were strong enough to fight with the Romans any longer upon the square, as being surrounded on all sides, and a kind of prisoners already, yet were they so accustomed to kill people, that they could not restrain their right hands from acting accordingly.”

– Josephus, Wars of the Jews, Book 6, 7:2

“And, behold, there was a man named Joseph, a counseller; and he was a good man, and a just: (The same had not consented to the counsel and deed of them;) he was of Arimathaea, a city of the Jews: who also himself waited for the kingdom of God. This man went unto Pilate, and begged the body of Jesus. And he took it down, and wrapped it in linen, and laid it in a sepulchre that was hewn in stone, wherein never man before was laid. And that day was the preparation, and the sabbath drew on. And the women also, which came with him from Galilee, followed after, and beheld the sepulchre, and how his body was laid.”

– Luke 23:50-55

Hahahaha.  They had taken an oath to the temple {the body of Christ;} and were not strong enough to fight with the Romans and just stood their watching the death of their Lord, because they were women, amiright?  Let’s make a summary and see if you can guess which of the two stories above it is about: Joseph was a good man and concealed the people and went to Jerusalem and begged for the remains so he could preserve them but those pussies from Galilee just stood around watching.  Was that about Joseph bar Mathea or Joseph of Arimathaea?  And remember, there is no such place as “Arimathaea” but Joseph bar Mathea is most definitely a historically attested man.

“…then does Apion load the ass, that is, himself, and lays on him a burden of fooleries and lies; for he writes of places that have no being, and not knowing the cities he speaks of, he changes their situation…”

– Flavius Josephus Against Apion, Book 1, 11:10

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